No I won’t pay you to review my game
At first I was receiving 1 or 2 of those emails almost every week. Now that I turned them all away I’m just receiving about 1 per month. Some of those people just can’t give up.
Hey your game is nice and I think we could really work together to help promote it. We can send a lot of people to your game and you would receive incredible exposure if you could just send us a pile of money that you obviously don’t have but since I didn’t bother to really check your game anyway I have no idea how big it is.
Not getting exposure is already annoying there’s really no need to add insult to it by trying to sell me a package of some thousands of $$$ to appear in some kind of pseudo-review magazine.
Look, I’ll pay you by referred users instead. I’m a good coder so preparing something like that is no trouble for me … Haha! Yeah right. They know just well they won’t make any money that way yet they tend to believe a lot more in their product when it’s just “pay for a whole lot of random exposure”.
Look buddy if you don’t try it you will never get a lof of players to your game …
Look my not-buddy, make a deal with me about referred user and I’m in. No? Oh I get it, there’s no way you can guarantee any results so you’re not going to get caught at your own game. Got it.
Of course they’re just doing their job yadda yadda yadda … And I’m doing mine as well and part of it involves posting about this whole “paid for review” thingy. Of course there’s nothing new here but that won’t stop me from rolling my eyes every time I see that kind of mail in my inbox.
At least you guys could try to be honest about it. I know that by selling dreams to some people that it works but when you’re writing to me just go the honest way.
Here’s an offer to spend a huge pile of money that you don’t have. We don’t really care about your game as we’re just running a business with no interest to help indie developers so I HAVE to harass people with such offers. Interested?
The answer will still be no but I might have a bit more respect for those people.
So once and for all, the day I’ll have the money to spend thousands on ads in magazine I’ll make a big flashing red post here warning everybody. Just be aware that before that there will be another post saying that the game is now making profits! …
Wasting time on me by trying to sell me ads is not what I call doing your job well. I can always write you a check if you don’t mind it bouncing back but then what’s the point …
Just go in-game, take a look at the number of players in the last 24 hours and take a wild guess at how much money the game is making every month …